To most people, Valentine’s day and even the week up to it is a time for celebrating love. It’s a time for a couple of romance for many. For others, it’s a time of longing and a feeling of inadequacy. If you have ever been single on Valentine’s day, it may have left you feeling like you are the only person without a partner on this day.
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Around this time in February people, couples especially, usually put their happiest and most romantic moments on Facebook and Instagram. For someone who hasn’t had a partner for years, it has sometimes made me feel inadequate. It has also made me feel that I must be doing something wrong since I don’t have a partner.
Over the years I have realized that this feeling is not true. Social media has a way of making you feel like you are missing something if you are not in a perfect relationship on this particular day of the year.
I have learned that it’s ok to be alone on this specific day. I used to believe that I was the only one in the whole world without a partner, but of course, I know that is not true now.
If you do not have a partner, your anxiety might be focusing on the fact that you believe you will never find a partner or great love. As someone who struggles with anxiety, I know this particular day can be tough.
9 ways to enjoy Valentine’s day if you have anxiety
Ignore the fact that it’s Valentine’s day
No one ever said that you are forced to celebrate Valentine’s day. In fact, there are still many countries that don’t celebrate this day. Who says that you have to?
For this year, you can try not to let tv advertising, store displays and social media posts make you feel bad. Tell yourself that February 14th is just another regular day of the year. There is absolutely no reason, why you can’t ignore the specifics of this day.
Gather your single friends and enjoy Valentine’s day together
You are probably not the only single in your group of friends. Ask them if they want to meet up and plan to go out or do something together. If your friends are in the same situation as yourself, it can help ease everyone’s loneliness. Bonus.
Make sure you do something fun:
- Comedy show
- Paintball – if you have never done this, I highly recommend trying it
- Cinema show
- Karaoke night
Make other plans on Valentine’s day if you have anxiety
In addition to the idea above you can plan other activities for you to do on this day. You can invite a friend or a family member to go with you.
- Sporting event
- See a play
- Go to a concert
- Go skydiving
Having plans to do something special on this day, will help you take your mind off the fact that you are single. Choosing something that you will remember for years to come, will also make you remember this day as something else than Valentine’s day.
Go to a concert
Music events always have a special atmosphere. People are usually excited because they actually want to listen to this music. Otherwise, they probably wouldn’t have paid for the concert.
If you have never gone to a concert on your own, it might not be something your anxiety feels good about. You can ask one of your single friends to join you. If you have the same taste in music it will be much more fun.
Instead of watching your friends post romantic pictures on Facebook and Instagram, unplug from your phone entirely for the day. Do something creative instead or go enjoy a long walk.
Dedicate the afternoon or evening to a creative project that you have been meaning to get done anyway. This will definitely take your mind off of how “in love” everyone else is.
Do a day-trip somewhere elsE on valentine’s day
If you need to get away from city life and influence, taking a day-trip completely out of town is a great way to spend Valentine’s day. A day-trip is an amazing way to lift your mood if you are feeling either anxious or sad on Valentine’s day.
Have a self-care/self-love day
Self-care is extremely important and it will make a huge difference to your mental health. What better way to spend Valentine’s day than to loving yourself and taking care of yourself? You don’t have to do an entire self-care day, but if you want to do it. Otherwise, you can simply do a few hours.
I recommend having a complete reset day. Cleaning is something that relaxes me. However weird that may sound to some. On a reset day, I start the day bright and early and I clean my entire apartment. I usually have reset days/self-care days on Sundays or on a day off.
Getting ready for the week ahead and getting on top of things will help you relax and feel great.
Whatever self-care means to you, take some time out of your calendar to meditate, go for a walk, watch a movie, eat a bowl of banana ice cream. Go for a swim and then sauna or do a fitness class. Whatever makes you feel relaxed and amazing for the rest of the day.
- Why you should stop feeling guilty about self-care
- Why self-care is wonderful for your mental health
- What’s inside my self-care toolkit?
- How to make a self-care toolkit for your mental health
Practicing gratitude on Valentine’s day is a great way to get your thoughts away from romance and relationships. Write down 3 things you are grateful for, even if you are single on this particular day.
As humans, we tend to take things for granted. It’s just a part of us, but being more aware of what you have instead of what you don’t have will have a positive impact on your life.
Book a therapy appointment for the day
If you are feeling very anxious or even sad about Valentine’s day, I highly recommend booking a therapy appointment. Having someone to talk to about your worries and fears over relationships and love is amazing.
Therapists can even help you realize what it is that you want in your life. Both in regards to work and love. I guarantee you that you are not the only person with a therapy appointment on Valentine’s day. You might even find that there are no times available at your local therapist.
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